I grew up in a “churched” family. Every Sunday morning, we would get dressed up and go to a small Lutheran church in the middle of town. I learned at an early age how to act in that church. Even at age 5, a lot was expected out of me. I had to stand when we read Bible verses, bow my head and close my eyes when we prayed, recite pre-written confessions of love, and, at age 10, take a class to learn the correct way to take communion.

As I grew older, the strict way I viewed organized religion started to blur. My mom’s side of the family suddenly abandoned church because of gossip and “drama.” My dad’s side was a different story. Being strict Catholics, they never spoke to us or invited us to dinner with everyone else. They saw my dad as lost because he took his family to a protestant church. My grandmother forgets my brother and my name.

When I was young, I blamed religion for making me get up early on weekends. I blamed religion for making me sit through long hours of pain-staking classes to learn a task that was meant to be meaningful. I blamed religion for turning my mom’s family away from God. I blamed religion for the pain I saw in my daddy’s eyes when my family and I were forced to sit by ourselves during family reunions. I started blaming religion 10 years ago. I think I still do.

You see, the word “religion” appears to be an absolute-evil term throughout the world today. When first hearing the word, one immediately relates the term to war, laws, and regulations. You suddenly think of rules you are forced to follow. Don’t steal. Don’t murder. Don’t curse. Don’t hate. Be kind. Be humble. Be generous. Be loving. People who follow a religion are turned into “goodie-goodies” instead of respected individuals. Now, “churched” people are looked down upon. They don’t look or act normally. They don’t have fun and they are out to get anyone who is a “non-believer.” They are seen as pushy, closed-minded, stereotypical, and full of pride. Why, I wonder, would any person in their right mind, want to convert and be titled “religious.”

The label has lost its compliment.

I feel that one of the reasons Christians are viewed this way is because of the lack of understanding about their God. Passages from the Bible are construed and are tainted to turn God into a strict authority figure¬. Take the story of Job. In this example, Satan takes notice of God’s most loyal followers, Job. He goes to God and says “Does Job fear God for nothing? Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has? You have blessed the work of his hands… stretch out your hand and strike [it all], and he will surely curse you to your face.” So God allows Satan to basically take everything from Job: his family, his job, his wealth, even his children. Once this story is told, most would see God as “a mean kid sitting on an anthill with a magnifying glass.”

Why, if Christians claim that God loves them that much, would He put them through such misery and despair? What they haven’t read is the rest of the story. God uses Job to show Satan that His believers are strong and trust in Him, even if rough spots get thrown at him. And that’s exactly what he did. Once he learned that his entire family perished, the first words to come out of Job’s mouth were “may the name of the Lord be praised.” Later in the book God speaks directly to Job.

“Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me, if you understand… “

Job couldn’t answer. God then continued to ask him questions neither he, nor any human could answer. He asked him if he could lay stars in the sky or command eagles to soar in the sky. In these chapters, God is showing Job that He knows more than Job does and that He has a plan.

“Surely I have spoken of things I did not understand, things to wonderful me to know,” Job replied. “Therefore… I repent.”

The Lord then shows His might, kindness, and love by making him twice as prosperous as he was before. He brought all of Jobs remaining relatives to his house and allowed them to comfort and console him. He then gave him livestock, beautiful children, and a long life. He lived to see his 140th birthday.

I’m angry, you see. I’m angry at the stereotypes that our society and world has proclaimed God to be. They will never know that God sent His son to die for them. They will never feel His empowering love embrace them. They will never trust in Him and in His guidance. They will never know that religion, even to “born-again” Christians, has become obscured and twisted. It has been turned into a tepid, insignificant honest-to-God obligation.

My favorite passage in the Bible is Isaiah chapter 43-44.

“But this is what the Lord says ‘Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you. When you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy one, your Savior… Since you are precious and honored in my site, and because I love you… Do not be afraid, for I am with you. I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more. Do not tremble. Do not be afraid. Did I not proclaim this and foretell it long ago? You are my witnesses. Is there any God besides me? No, there is no other Rock; I know not one.”

This is not a bully. This is not an angry God out to spread destruction and disease throughout the world. This is not a God of scarifies, chants, and traditions. This is not a God of politics. He is not a republican. He is not a democrat. This is not a God of war or famine. This is not a God of separation of church and state or even denominations separating the church itself. This is a God of a love deeper than you or I understand.

I know for sure, after years of confusion and heartache that there is a God who is fathering me. A God who knows me better than I know myself. I don't need to know all the answers. I don't need to know if communion is the actual body and blood, or if women pastors should be allowed. I don't. The creator of the universe loves me. He loves me. He's taking care of me. What else do I need?

The book of Luke states "God feeds the birds in the air and clothes the meadows with flowers, then, how much more will God take care of you?"

I feel His presence in my life every second of the day. When I stop talking with Him for even a short period of time, He has me running back into his arms, scared stiff.
God longs to hear from you and I. Aches. I wish you knew how much.

See, I’m not for religion. I’m not for the rules and regulations that churches and denominations use to box up a beautiful relationship with God. I’m for fearing and loving the God that created my thoughts and heart, and I don’t mean the tormenter God that our society makes Him out to be. Going to church, being different, and following rules do not make you a Christian. Your relationship with God has to flow past Sunday and guide your entire life. I hate religion. I love the God who is much bigger than who I am and who I imagine Him to be. And I will keep myself in His arms until the day I die.

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